I've had a couple of stupidly late nights over the weekend and my clock is all out of sorts. Without jet-lag, I am back on American time.
I'm still waiting for the subliminal messages to kick in, although when I was in the shower I did start to feel unusually enthusiastic about my day ahead, so that's good. Now all I have to do is transfer that enthusiasm to my life outside of the shower and we would be getting somewhere.
I also had a bit of strange experience in the Supermarket yesterday. Every week I plan what I want to buy and make a list, excluding chocolate and desserts which I consider a foregone conclusion and which are added to my basket on automatic pilot before I hit the checkouts. But yesterday I reached the 'treat-buying' phase and couldn't think of anything I fancied. Maltesers? hmmm..No. Minstrels? ... Noooo... Strawberry Trifle?.... Tiramisu? None of them appealed. I felt like a new person, walking home with two bags of healthy food. Perhaps this is the New Me, I thought. And then I made a cup of tea and crammed 4 chocolate digestives in to my mouth, sideways.
Oh well, little steps and all that, I said, spitting crumbs.
I keep finding things to do which highlight my need to hang on to things. I have a pile of Good Food magazines which can go to a local waiting room... but perhaps I ought to read through them first and scan in any recipes that I may wish to cook at any point in my adult life, because they are bound to be the only recipes that are not listed in any form on the Internet.
I have a pile of cookery books in the kitchen that I haven't opened for years, but I still want to hang on to them too. Just in case.
Surely if I am not using these things, I should just get rid of them? Or am I keeping hold of them knowing that I am bound to need them the second I no longer have them...? There is a balance between being dragged down by too many possessions, and not wanting to relinquish things that I could possibly need which would cost me to replace. Oh where is that fine line?
At least I have my memories. Last night I trawled through folder upon folder of photos on my laptop, merrily reflecting on my experiences travelling through South East Asia in 2007. There are a disappointing lack of sunsets, lots of pictures of rice fields in the rain, temples of every size and form, and more Buddhas than you can shake a stick at. Oh, and this: